HAVING FUN COMES FIRST
It is often said that play is a child's work - and the idea of learning through play can be understood by looking at the game of peek-a-boo. A baby playing peek-a-boo with mom learns -
- what it feels like to be held
- about parts of the body
- that mom is still there, even when she can't be seen
- that mom helps baby keep emotions under control
- that the baby can communicate with mom to play again and again
- that mom thinks baby is wonderful and that they enjoy playing together
For the baby, the joy of playing together is the best part of playing with someone. It is how children start to form relationships that help develop self-esteem and self-confidence.
Getting to Know Your Child Trough Play
Playing together is a great way to get to know and understand a child. You will soon find out if your child is fussy, shy, quick, impatient, easy-going or adventurous.
PLAY IS A SPECIAL LANGUAGE
Babies explore the world through play. First, by looking and listening, then by putting everything in their mouths, and by copying the people around them.
A little later, when children are able to play 'pretend' they use their games to practice things that they are trying to learn and understand. For example:
- a child who is just learning to ride a tricycle may make a teddy bear ride a toy trike.
- if children have been hospitalized, they may want to play doctor with their dolls and do to the dolls all things that were done to them in the hospital.
- if there is a new baby in the house, or it's time to start school or go to a new daycare, the teddy bears may have to play through the new experiences.
Children's play becomes a language. If you can understand your child's play language, you will be able to understand your child.
LET CHILDREN LEAD
Allow your child to make the decisions about the game you play together. When you and your child are playing with blocks, ask, "Where do you want me to put this block?" If you are playing with cars,ask, "Where is the driver of the car going? Should the car turn left or right? " The child will tell you whether the car needs gas or is going to the grocery store. Expand the game by asking other questions. "Who is in the car?" "What are we going to buy?" "Why?"
Follow your child's directions. It makes the child feel valued and important, and gives you the opportunity to listen to the child's play language. Children's games belong to them, but when your child is frustrated, or can't think what to do next, a suggestion from you will be appreciated.
PRAISE
The best praise that you can give is to see and value what your child is doing and to recognize that the game being played is vitally important to the child.
When you say, "Well done!", try to value the accomplishment , not the child.
ENCOURAGEMENT
You can encourage children with words that confirm their experience. For instance, "That was really difficult. You did a great job." You can also relay your own feelings. "Thank you for setting the table."
However, not all praise and encouragement need to be spoken. A wink, a smile, a nod of your head...all of these let your child know that you see and appreciate what is being done.
The best encouragement is being noticed and appreciated. It helps children to feel good about themselves, and to develop a sturdy sense of self.
PEOPLE TO PLAY WITH
Children do not really play together until they are around 2.5 to 3 years old, but before this they learn a lot by watching and playing alongside each other. Babies respond to other babies and usually enjoy the attention of older children...and older children are usually are interested in babies.
People are social beings and babies and toddlers benefit from being around other children.
Watching other children play prepares your toddler for playing with a friend. Many communities have drop-ins, play grounds and resource centres for mothers and children. Ask at your local community centre, library or parks and recreation department.
